Today I visited Brighton to deliver all my work for the Brighton Ourhouse Fair, and decided to visit the Tea Cosy. I had heard that there was a strict tea room etiquette, so I read all the rules on their website and wore my Sunday best. It was exactly as I had hoped; a shameless shrine to the Royals, every crevice piled high with incredible memorabilia. I got to sit underneath a splendid portrait of Queen Victoria, and whilst embracing the spirit of the venue, listening to some of my favourite songs, including Vera Lynn, we decided to order the full works:
"Lady Diana Spencer, Princess of Wales, Queen of Hearts, 10 year Anniversary, Your Death Has Torn Our Lives Apart, Fairwell Dear Princess Queen Of Hearts, Forever In Our Thoughts, Memorial Afternoon Tea"
Oh my days, it was the most glorious afternoon tea I have ever had. A giant tea pot of almost never ending tea, and a cake stand which featured unashamedly soft white bread with no crusts, and lashings of salad cream, scones and all the biscuits you could ever want for. To top it all off 'Candle in the Wind' was played on the piano when it was served to us (this may have been a coincidence).
So even though I couldn't really make much of a dent to the biscuit mountain, and I kept having to silence my mother, loudly singing the words to, 'We'll meet again', whilst clearly breaking etiquette rule number eight of, 'Conversation should never be louder than two tones above the chink of a tea cup and good table manners are expected at all times.', I highly recommend a visit.
But seriously, don't break the rules. I've heard there are consequences.